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Sikh Wedding Rituals

Sikhism is a monotheistic religion opposed to idol worship and is against the practice of asceticism, the caste system and ritualism. 

A Sikh wedding is called an Anand Karaj. The ceremony takes place in the presence of the Sikh Holy Book, the Guru Granth Sahib Ji. 

Although there may be some minor differences in the regional customs leading up to the religious ceremony and following the ceremony, there is very little variance in the actual Anand Karaj ceremony in the Gurdwara. 

Rituals at the Bride’s home-

Chuda

On the wedding day the rituals at the girl’s home begin with the Chuda ceremony. To commemorate the Chuda ceremony, a havan or puja is conducted by the pandit. Thereafter, the pundit ties a mauli on the to be bride’s wrist. The oldest maternal uncle and aunt play an important role in the performance of the ceremony. They fast till the event is completed. Chuda is basically a set of red and cream ivory bangles that is touched by all present. People touch the chuda and give their heartiest wishes to the girl for her future married life. Also, they sprinkle flower petals on the bride. Prasad is distributed to all. After that, the girl’s uncle, aunt, friends and cousins tie kaliras (silver, gold or gold plated traditional ornaments) to a bangle worn by the girl.

Vatna

Four lamps or diyas are lit and the bride is made to sit facing them. Oil is constantly poured into the lamps, so that the glow from diyas is reflected on her face. Vatna involves applying the paste made from turmeric powder and mustard oil all over the girl’s body by her female friends and relatives. This is done to make the girl look more beautiful on the special day of our life.

Ghara Ghardoli

The Ghara Ghardoli follows the Vatna. In the Ghara Ghardoli ritual, the bride’s sibling or sibling’s spouse visits the nearby temple and fills a pitcher with holy water. The girl is then bathed with this holy water. Thereafter, the bride wears their wedding attire. The ghara ghardoli and the vatna ceremonies take place at the groom’s house too. But over there, the boy’s sister-in-law brings the pitcher of water. As per the tradition, their wedding dress is presented to them by their respective maternal uncles.

Rituals at the Groom’s home

Sehrabandi

Like the bride’s home, the Vatna and Ghara Ghardoli are followed by the dressing up of groom in his wedding attire. After the groom has dressed up in his wedding clothes, a pooja is performed. The boy wears a pink color turban. Thereafter, the groom’s father or any elderly relative ties the "sehra" on the groom’s head. It is the ceremony of tying of the traditional headdress on the groom. The 'sehra' or veil of golden threads is taken around to each member of the family to be blessed, which is touched by all the people present in the pooja. The 'sarbala' (a young boy, usually a nephew of the groom) will act as his constant companion and be with him until the wedding ceremony is over.  After the completion of Sehrabandi ceremony, all those who witness the function give gifts and cash to the boy as a token of good luck.

The women sing 'seheras' or traditional songs appropriate to the ceremony. The groom is now ready to proceed to the bride's home for the wedding ceremony.

Ghodi Chadna

The Ghori Chadna is the final ceremony at the groom’s place. The groom's brother's wife applies a touch of 'kajal' (kohl) to the groom's eyes to ward off the evil eye and his sisters and female cousins braid the bridle with 'vagaan' (golden tassels) for which they receive gifts from the groom's mother.
Thereafter, the groom’s sisters and cousins feed and adorn his mare. To ward off the evil eye, people use cash and perform the Varna ritual. After that the boy climbs the horse and immediately leaves his home for the wedding venue.

Departure of the Baraat

Close family and friends are invited to the house to depart together for the Gurdwara singing traditional wedding song. Everyone receives tea and snacks before departing. Keeping an old Sikh tradition alive the groom has arranged to arrive by horseback for the meeting of the families.

Rituals at the Marriage Venue

Milni Ceremony 

When the groom’s barat reaches the wedding venue, Milni ceremony is performed. The bride’s close relatives give a warm welcome to the groom and his relatives with flower garlands. Rose water is sprinkled on them. In the Milni ceremony, the girl's relatives give Shagun (a token of good luck) to the groom's close relatives. It is done in the descending order, beginning from the elder most. Cash and clothes are gifted.

Performing Ardas

Ardas is the common Sikh prayer and is invoked at the start and conclusion of every Sikh event. Here both families perform Ardas on their meeting each other.

Ragis perform kirtan (the singing of hymns from Sri Guru Granth Sahib) as people begin to enter the Gurdwara for the beginning of the ceremony. This is when the bride makes here first public appearance of the day. Men and women sit on opposite sides of the Gurdwara hall at equal distances from Sri Guru Granth Sahib. Non Sikh male and female visitors and guests can usually sit together if they wish.

Ananad Karaj or Lavan Phere (The Actual Wedding Cermony)

The 'Anand Karaj' or wedding ritual takes place at 'anand vela' (early morning, usually associated with peace and tranquility). In case the ceremony begins a little later, it must conclude before noon. In the presence of the Guru Granth Sahib, a normal Morning Prayer service is conducted, after which the 'Asa di Vaar' (the morning hymn) is sung.

The bride, face covered, is escorted in by her father or uncle, her sisters and girlfriends and seated on the left of the groom.

Since the Sikhs do not have an ordained clergy, a respected member of the community or gurudwara may conduct the ceremony. The officiator of the ceremony asks the bride, groom and their parents to stand for the 'Ardaas', after which they all bow down to the Holy Book in assent of the marriage.

The bride's father places a corner of the bride's veil or 'pallav' in the groom's hands and over his shoulder into the bride's hands, symbolically connecting them and giving his daughter away in marriage. The groom then leads the bride four times around the Holy Book, each round interspersed with hymns containing blessings and advice.

Conclusion of the Religious Function

After the Lavan the Anand hymn by Guru Amar Das is recited. This is followed by lectures and kirtan. The religious ceremony is formally concluded by the entire congregation standing for the final Ardas of the marriage. After this Sri Guru Granth Sahib is now opened to any page at random and the hymn is read out as the days order from the Guru for the occasion (hukamnama). Karah Prashad, ceremonial sacremental pudding is then distributed to everyone to mark the formal conclusion of the ceremony.

Well Wishes from All

When all these rituals are over, the couple gets up to touch the feet of all the elder members in the family and seek their blessings for a happily married life.

Both parents now congratulate the couple. In many cases guests now follow to present the couple with gifts of a cash offering in their lap. In this wedding the couple declined these as they said they had received the ultimate gift, the blessing of the Guru. Everyone then leaves for the dining hall to sit on the floor in langer (the community kitchen) and enjoy a meal in the spirit of equality and humility.

Aftermath

After the official religious ceremony concluded the couple ate in the langer hall and chatted with friends and family. They later went to a park to have some photographs taken and then journeyed to the bride’s home.

Doli (The bride send-off ceremony)

The groom lifts the bride's veil and seeing her as a married woman for the first time her family blesses her with money. She changes into a set of clothes and jewellery brought by the groom's parents. She feeds the male members of her own family with cooked rice and turning her back on them throws back handfuls of puffed rice, invoking a blessing of prosperity on her father and family. She then bids a tearful farewell to her family and friends - a very emotional moment in any Indian wedding.

Her father seats her in the decorated car alongside her husband and her brother escorts her to her new home. On reaching the marital home, the groom's mother, who pours a little oil outside on the doorstep before they enter, receives the couple. She then attempts to drink water from a 'lota' (steel jar), but the groom prevents her! After the third attempt he relents and she drinks it. This is repeated with six other female relatives.

Doli Dinner

Celebration of the bride's arrival into the groom's family. The groom's family and close friends get together the night the bride arrives for the 'doli' dinner. Literally translated 'doli' means palanquin. As a courtesy, they may invite the bride's family and her guests who have come from out of town. This may be a very quiet evening with a home-cooked meal, or a full-fledged celebration with caterers called in and exuberant singing and dancing.